While your humble correspondent was growing up, he had parents and other relatives who were Eisenhower Republicans, along with other adult family members who were Truman Democrats. By using the usual adolescent/young adult method of watching and listening to these people, he wound up as an Independent, because neither party quite fit his nascent blunt and cranky personality. In addition, he wound up a Centrist, because during the 60’s and early 70’s the wingnuts on both sides were scarily extreme (note to extremists: burning crosses and bombing buildings do NOT endear you to the populace), which repulsed him.

Even if you don’t agree with the destination, it is an understandable journey thereto. And the title of Radical Centrist is not all that hard to suss – to vehemently reject extremism of all sorts will lead one to adopt this designation. However, not all ideologies are self-consistent (Martin Short once called himself a “Radical Moderate”, and this writer hopes it was a joke).

One widely-accepted designation, first gaining wide acceptance during the late ‘70’s, is “Conservative Revolution”. Well worth a sneer, even if one is only contemptuous of the obvious ignorance of how to use a dictionary. Unbelievably, the term is now commonly accepted, which just shows how repetition can help to sell even the most worthless of products. We have “Conservative Revolutionaries” all over the place, and they are in many cases ignorant of just how idiotic they appear. As their title is an oxymoron, let us then call them “oxymorons”.

A Conservative is an antidisestablishmentarianist – a defender of the establishment, AKA the status quo.  A conservative who revolts is schizophrenic by definition (which explains a lot of what they say, now I think on it). 

What is truly insidious is how the term is used as a propaganda tool. When someone revolts, they are creating an impression that there is something to revolt against – that they are revolting against something evil, horrible, nasty, etc. This is meant to engender a certain sympathy for these supposed “freedom fighters”, as if they were somehow equivalent to victimized indigenous populations. The reality is far from that – every single one of these oxymorons that Mr. Blunt and Cranky has encountered has been a beneficiary of the status quo, and not in any way persecuted. Rather, they have ingested far too much wingnut kool-aid, and by so doing have come to the conclusion that their life (which would be the envy of 90 % of the world’s population) has been made wretched by, well, somebody other than themselves, they’re not sure, just some flavor of Other.

And at whose hands did this wretchedization occur? Why, it was largely created over the decades by a combination of Left, Center-Left, Right, and Center-Right politicos at all levels of government. And a plurality of said politicos were (you guessed ‘er, Chester) conservatives.

This, then, the final level of self-contradiction: not only are these “Conservative Revolutionaries” rebelling against those nasty  ol’ liberals, but they are rebelling to an even greater extent against conservatives.  They are trying to fight and defeat, well, themselves. Oxymoronic? On second thought, take away the first three letters.

Next Time: When a mathematical majority means doodly-squat.

Mr. B & C