Mr. Blunt and Cranky was driving to The Place That Pays Him To Go There, and listening to the news along the way, as is his wont. One story that caught his attention was about a group of Loony Lefties that were protesting in front of President Obama’s local election office at the Ohio State University. The core message of their screechfest? Why, that Obama is not sufficiently perfect, so some of them would sit out the election in a sulk, because they did not get every single item on their Leftie wish list. Never mind that Obama has handed the Left more goodies than any other Prexy since LBJ (or maybe even FDR): it is not enough for these spoiled, greedy brats. 

One must assume these stupid f***s were real crybabies on Christmas day as they were growing up, if they didn’t get ev-ar-ree-THING on their Santa list. Certainly, they are acting that way now, throwing temper tantrums and threatening to not vote if Obama does not somehow develop superpowers and single-handedly create a magical rainbow-pony paradise in a single instant. Hell, these idiots would probably STILL bitch if the magical rainbow ponies didn’t poop sparkly butterflies.

Of all the stupid f***s that this writer has encountered in his long life, this bunch is the stupid f***iest. Krishna on a pogo stick, these thrice-damned morons clearly either do not remember that the exact same action by the Loony Left in 2000 was a major reason that Bush The Dumber was able to occupy the Oval Office for eight years – eight years in which the Left got the living s*** kicked out of it (along with the economy, our rights, our soldiers, the middle class, and much of the Middle East); or they are so far beyond ordinary stupid f***itude that they feel justified in enabling the Bushies to take power. And that would be truly epic stupid f***ery.

Much as it grieves this radical centrist to point it out, the Presidential election is a binary choice, no matter what sort of stupid f***ing crap these petulant brats may believe. If you vote for one, you also vote against the other. If you vote for neither, you are still tacitly voting for one or the other.

Specifically: if you are anything other than a Raging Righty and you do not vote for Obama, then you have f***ing well voted for Romney. Remember in 2000, all the thumb-sucking stupid f*** extremist liberals who did not vote for Gore?  Those were effective votes for Bush. Not voting for the Dem = a vote for the Repub (and vice versa, of course).  It is pure mathematics and it’s not amenable to pseudo-intellectual sophomoric debate. One or the other.  D or R.  Sucks, but that’s the reality of vote tabulation in 2012 America, at the national level at least.

Please, don’t be like The Stupidest  F*** in the World, currently on tour and demonstrating his uber-stupid f***itude at the Ohio State University. Be like the smart kid that was interviewed on the news broadcast: she is a Loony Leftie and isn’t happy with Obama, but she is going to vote against Romney.

You can be smart, or you can be a contestant for the title of Stupidest  F*** in the World. Please be smart.

Mr. B & C

P.S.: The Crankster is an Independent, and truly wishes the binary nature of Presidential elections were not so. But he learned long ago: “wish in one hand and hold a horseapple in the other, squeeze them both, and see which one comes true”. We must deal with the world as it is, not as it should be: and meanwhile, work to create the world that we want, so that someday we may no longer be obliged to choose between two handfuls of crap. Meanwhile, we oftimes are obliged to just pick the hand with the smaller piece of poo in it.