And Justice Roy More sex with goatsore is the biggest pro-goat-f***er in the entire state. You see, for all his anti-marriage-equality rhetoric, Justice More sex with goatsore hasn’t said, well, a f***ing thing about his state’s pro-bestiality laws. Seems he likes it to to be legal to molest livestock and family pets, does it not?

By contrast, Mr. More sex with goatsore hates himself some marriage equality. The only logical conclusion to draw is that Alabama, having elected an anti-gay, pro-bestiality Chief Justice, supports sex with animals over sex with humans.

Of course, this conclusion could be disproven, by different behavior among Alabama voters. Unlikely, but possible. Meanwhile, all heterosexual animal abusers (who are rightly considered criminals in many other parts of the country) are warmly welcomed in the state. Unlike law-abiding gay people.

That, Gentle Reader, is totally f***ed. F***ed like Justice Roy Moore’s favorite goat.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky