There is PLENTY of Money for Amtrak. Teapubbies Need to Stop Stealing it, That’s All.

For all of Little Johnny Boehner’s lying and denying, lack of funding DID in fact help cause the Amtrak crash, and it IS the fault of our “Republican” congress that those funds were cut. YOU CAN’T BUILD ANYTHING WITHOUT TOOLS AND MATERIALS, AND YOU NEED MONEY TO GET TOOLS AND MATERIALS.

Duh. Really, man, f***ing DUH. Hey, John-Boy: companies won’t give you stuff for free just because they love your tan, man.

And why does there appear to be no money to fund Amtrak (and myriad other critical infrastructure projects around the US)? Because “Republicans” robbed the Peter that is Transportation funds to pay the Pauls who are Teapublican millionaires and billionaires, that’s why.

You can occasionally find a rare honest Congresscritter who will admit that Congress didn’t adequately fund the safety mandates imposed on America’s railway system by that very same Congress. But Boehner, who is decidedly not at all honest, would rather bluster out non sequiturs than admit that he and his fellow Teapublicans are looting the lot of us blind to pad their offshore bank accounts.

Offshore accounts like those of defense industry types, to whom the Pentagon shovels extra hundreds of billions of dollars, even though it can’t even keep track of the funds it already gets.

Accounts like those belonging to charter school scam artists who profit handsomely, providing substandard and unaudited “educations” to our children, all the while stealing from the taxpayers and starving the public schools of funds that were SUPPOSED to go to said public schools.

Accounts like those belonging to Big Motherf***ing Oil tycoons, who rob us twice: at the pump AND when we pay our taxes.

It’s all a symptom of Teapublicans’ pathological anti-government idiocy. The idea that government is bad, bad, bad, oh yesyesyyes, soverybadindeed: even as they mulct that government, and by extension we taxpayers, of every scrap of money we possess. Seems like they should LOVE the government for providing their illegal funds, but NOOOOO…the “Republican” party that once created infrastructure (like the Interstate highway system) now hates the very idea of spending on public works.

 “The reason we don’t have beautiful new airports and efficient bullet trains is not that we have inadvertently stumbled upon stumbling blocks; it’s that there are considerable numbers of Americans for whom these things are simply symbols of a feared central government, and who would, when they travel, rather sweat in squalor than surrender the money to build a better terminal.” The ideological rigor of this idea, as absolute in its way as the ancient Soviet conviction that any entering wedge of free enterprise would lead to the destruction of the Soviet state, is as instructive as it is astonishing.

The money IS there, Gentle Reader – we have provided trillions of dollars for it via our tax dollars over the years. If Congress would spend public money to benefit the, you know, PUBLIC, we could have trains that run safely and quickly; we could have roads and bridges that are safe; we could have clean water, safe food, and all the other benefits we are supposed to already be getting for our hard-earned.

The only reason we don’t get what we pay for, and it IS the ONLY reason, is because Congress is robbing us blind, even as their theft kills us. Time to throw each and every GOP official out of office at the next election. Then prosecute them and get our money back. With those funds in hand, we can build the America we’ve already paid for; indeed, paid for several times over.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

Lots of Teapublicans Look a Lot like KKK Types.

See that Teapublican? She wants the Black members of Congress lynched. That means she wants them murdered by white vigilantes, like the KKK used to do. She said so, straight up:

Tea Party radio host Andrea Shea King argued recently that Democratic lawmakers — and specifically members of the Congressional Black Caucus — should be put to death by hanging if they boycotted Israel Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s Tuesday speech to Congress

“Obama doesn’t have to run for reelection again, a lot of these guys do,” King said in a clip of her radio show that was published by Right Wing Watch on Monday. “Listen, I would like to think that these guys could pay with their lives, hanging from a noose in front of the U.S. Capitol Building.”

Think she’s an outlier? Think most Teapubbies aren’t racists? Think most “Republicans” aren’t totally down with KKK-style torture and murder of any black person who gets into a position of authority (or acts “uppity”, in Teapublican terms)? Better think again:

And thousands of other examples exist from notable Teapublicans, in office and out. The “Republican” party tacitly encourages their many violent, racist, treasonous, and seditious members by not denouncing them. Indeed, the GOP rarely says anything to discourage such unconstitutional and illegal behavior.

Tells you all you need to know about the once Grand Old Party. They have become the Garroting Old Party, or perhaps the Gibbet Old Party would be more accurate. They are showing their true nature, and it is a vile and revolting vision that is being revealed.

Anybody who votes for a Repub is showing their approval for KKK-style actions and segregation. ANYBODY and everybody who votes Repub is enabling this behavior. Vote for a Teabagger, you vote to support treason and the murdering of black people. Period.

And neither the blood from the murdered people of color, nor the ashes from burnt crosses (sometimes with people of color tied to them) will ever wash off the hands of Repub voters.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

How to tell a Congresscritter to F*** off: Eric Holder shows the way.

Ultimate mastery of f-bomb dropping was on display in Congress yesterday as “Representative” Louie Gohmert (R:Bedlam) was whupping on the Attorney General during a photo op hearing. Louie whupped, and AG Holder whupped right back. Typical stuff, up to that point.

But then, at the end, General Holder threw a F-bomb right up the proboscis of the “distinguished gentleman”: he said, “Good luck with your asparagus.” That, Gentle Reader, is f-bomb usage of the highest order.

For those unfamiliar with Gohmert’s long and apparently intimate relationship with the noble stalk-like veggie, a refresher may be found here. On a previous occasion, Louie went all lizard-s*** on Holder, to the point that even other “Republicans” noticed the scaly fecality of his behavior (which tells you how crazy the man was acting). The good Mr. Gohmert got himself so waxed with wroth, he said this:

“The attorney general will not cast aspersions on my asparagus.”

Thus making himself even more of a joke than usual (which is pretty hard to do), and indeed, Gohmert’s pile of Asparagus jokes has been growing ever larger since that day. Asparagus this, asparagus that.

Thus allowing the AG to tell Louie to f*** himself, using “asparagus”. That, friends, is damn near Jedi Master-level f-bomb tossing. Truly magnificent.

It makes you proud of our public servants, doesn’t it?

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

Married Congresscritter caught screwing around with a staff member. Keeps his job but fires her.

And of course, he’s a big “family values” guy. “Representative” Vance McAllister, a “Christian” with a wife and five kids was caught on camera canoodling with a married staff member. Depressingly common behavior for “Republican” Fundagelicals, you’ll agree. And after he got caught, he decided to keep his cushy job and fire the woman with whom he was f***ing around. Sadly, that too is common.

Here is the likewise-common “values” campaign statement:

McAllister ran on a faith and family-based platform and featured his wife and five children in campaign ads. “Here at the McAllister house, we have a big family breakfast every Sunday before church. Kelly does the cooking, and I do the dishes,” McAllister said of his wife during a campaign ad. “It’s here in this house that Kelly and I worked to instill the values of faith, family, and country in our five children. If you will trust me with your vote, you can count on me to take those values to Washington.”

Here is a picture of him living his real values with Mrs. Melissa Anne Hixon Peacock:

And here is (part) of what he said after getting busted:

Peacock has been “taken off the payroll in the past 24 hours,” according to The News-Star, who spoke with McAllister’s chief of staff. The congressman said that he will run for re-election, “unless there is an outcry for me not to serve, and so far there has been an outpouring of support, not for my actions, but for me to continue to represent the people.”

Dafuq? No, really, dafuq???? Two married people, both cheating on their spouses. One keeps his six-figure gig, and shit-cans the other. The Congressman keeps his gig and fires the woman he was using.

That, if you like, is “Republican outreach to women”. Females, you have been warned. The GOP will screw you big-time, whether or not they kiss you first.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

Proof positive that ObamaCare is working:

Yesterday, your humble correspondent called a medical provider and asked for some supplies to be sent to chez Cranky. He was told that there would be a several-day delay: due to all of the newly-insured people that were getting medical care, they were having to order more supplies, and hire more help to meet demand. I replied that I understood,and thanked the harried woman on the other end of the phone.

After hanging up, a victory yell was heard by everyone on earshot: because, you see, this was proof that the Affordable Care Act is working. Here’s why:
Number A: lots of newly-insured people are getting life-saving medical care.
Letter 2: people are getting jobs to help provide care to the newly insured.
Thirdly: companies that make medical supplies will likewise have to add more staff, and order more raw materials, which means more jobs further down the supply chain.
Finally: all these increases will result in price reductions due to economies of scale.

The ACA is a long way from perfection, I grant you: but it also takes us a long way towards better health care for us all.

Proven by this example, and millions of others just like it, across the country. Thanks, Mister President.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

Eric Cantor travels to Davos, using taxpayer funds that COULD have gone to unemployment benefits.

Yes, that hypocritical parasite is lapping up luxury in Switzerland at our expense. This after telling unemployed Americans that there was no money for them.

It is time for America’s hard-working citizens to realize this truth: we send billions upon billions to these lying leeches in our taxes, and they blow our money on luxury trips, private barbers, and shovel millions of dollars to their billionaire buddies. And then they tell us that the country is broke. Bull-f***ing-s***. We aren’t broke at all. There is a lot of money there.

But the money is wasted and stolen by the “trickle-down” crowd in Congress. A perfect example: Cantor’s luxurious trip to Davos will cost more in a day than an unemployed person will get in six months.

Repeat: Eric Cantor’s luxurious trip to Davos will cost more in one single day than a REAL hard-working American’s unemployment benefits would cost for half a year.

Sick of Teapublicans yet? Then for crying out loud, stop f***ing voting for them.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

Hey, Congress: Here’s how to raise your approval ratings by 30 %.

As you may have heard, Congress’s approval rating just hit another record low: only nine percent of Americans think they don’t suck. It is hard to be disliked to a greater extent than that, but hey, they might be able to pull it off.

Of course, they COULD look at that chart up there, and by making a single change, raise their approval rating by 30 percent. That change? Why, doing their f***jng jobs, that’s all.

The 39% approval rating they had back in 2009 was not earned by their moral goodness; nor was it a result of diligence, comity, or even treating each other with much dignity and respect. It was earned by passing bills that needed passed, confirming appointments that needed confirmed, even though they were acting like ill-tempered toddlers much of the time. They worked, fought, debated, argued, and then compromised for the good of the country. You know, what COngress is supposed to do in the first place.

How about it, boys and girls? Would you like an approval rating close to that of Obama’s? Act like you did in 2009, and you’ll get ratings like you did in 2009. Or, keep on f***ing off and f***ing up, and see if you can get down to a 1 % rating.

Which would be weirdly appropriate, if you think about it.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

It does NOT say, “All men are created equal, except for f*****s, dy**s and qu***s”.

Or, for that matter, anyone else you happen to sling such pejorative names at. No, the Constitution says “All men are created equal”. It does not carve out exceptions for religion, skin color, or gender, and it sure as Hell doesn’t exclude LGBT Americans. All means all.

So it is sad that a law saying that little bit of obviousness even has to be created in the first place, and it is even more depressing that it is likely to get shot down again by our elected “Republicans.” All means all.

Sad though the necessity may be, the law needs passed. Just like the laws banning discrimination based on skin tone, X and Y chromosomes, religion and physical limitations. And anyone who opposes such equality can suck on the Constitution. Equality for all, that is what it says.

AND ALL MEANS ALL.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

House “Republicans” cut healthcare.gov funding by 90%. No wonder it doesn’t work well.

Hell, we’re lucky it works at all. Here’s the budget request for building healthcare.gov. 10 billion dollars to build the online exchanges allowing those eligible Americans in a red or purple state to buy health insurance. The Teapublicans gave them 1 billion. And now, they are “outraged” that the online system isn’t working perfectly, and are demanding to know why.

It is pretty safe to say that a NINETY-F***ING PERCENT CUT IN FUNDING had something to do with it. Pretty darned safe.

Try commuting on 10% of the gas you need. Try getting by with 10% of the food you need. Try building a house with 10% of the lumber you need. How well is that likely to work for ya?

Hey, House Repubes- want to know why the website rollout sucked? Look in a friggin’ mirror.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

Our do-nothing Congress, complaining that ObamaCare doesn’t do enough? That’s like having Jeffrey Dahmer call you a killer.

Congress hasn’t accomplished f***-all since 2010. They tried and tried to destroy s*** instead of doing their jobs. And now, these useless moochers, these parasites, these pimples on the arse of our nation; these “representatives” are criticizing the ACA for only partly working. The chutzpah is truly breathtaking.

It’s like having Ron White tell you to lay off the Scotch.
It’s like having David Vitter call you a pervert.
It’s like having the Westboro Baptist Church call you a hater.
It’s like having Anthony Weiner call you a slut.

What’s worse, the “news” media are acting like this is acceptable and sensible. They are acting as though a load of do-nothing layabouts have the right to criticize someone else who is actually doing something, for not doing it perfectly.

This writer will pay attention to Repub criticism of the ACA as soon as said Repubs get off their obese behinds and earn their huge paychecks and bennies. And not one moment before.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky