Cuccinellingus

In the “you gotta be kidding me” department we have Virginia’s Attorney General and “Republican” gubernatorial candidate Ken Cuccinelli, a big government guy who wants to tell you what kind of sex you can have. Gay or straight, married or not, he has pronounced himself to be your Bedroom Police.

He is still trying to reinstate an unconstitutional ban on certain consensual sex acts between adults (hint: think “oral”, but leave out “Roberts”). Indeed, he is campaigning on that position. Evidently, Virginia is too much “for lovers” to suit the guy. Or perhaps he thinks there aren’t enough Virgins in Virginia.

Thus we have a sitting attorney general trying to re-enact an unconstitutional law. We have a “small government” guy promoting Big Brother government. And he claims he’s doing all this to protect us. Typical Big Government type.

Anybody who can tie their brain into those kinds of knots must be capable of some pretty awesome contortions elsewhere, too: so in honor of this closet kinkster, we propose a sex act to be named after the man: Cuccinellingus .

It just might catch on.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

It’s Official: Virginia “Republicans” Are Bats*** Insane

E. W. Jackson, a black “Christian” clergyman who supports segregation, hates Obama, gays and Moslems,, as well as most of his fellow Americans, and is generally considered to be absolutely barking mad; this man is the party’s candidate for Lieutenant Governor. Epic insanity, for the party and the man himself.

But they did not stop at nominating an utter and complete loon for that office: they have nominated another man whose wing has come off his nut to be their Gubernatorial candidate: Ken Cuccinelli, who recently showed his crazy stripe by attempting to tell married adults what sorts of sex they might have in their hitherto private bedrooms. Not only that, he has told Virginia state universities that they must discriminate, or they’ll be in big trouble.

So, after an election in which America loudly and clearly told both parties to get the Hell out of our bedrooms and stop discriminating against people for any reason whatsoever, Vir-ginny Repubs have told us that they are so obsessed with the sex lives of Virginians that they propose electing two sex-hating perverts to the two highest offices in the state.

Is it any wonder so many of us refuse to even consider voting for Elephants these days? Crazy. Just plain f***ing bughouse nuts.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky