Penny-Pinching Teapublicans Kill more Taxpayers. (Amtrak Edition)

Their response? “Pinch MORE pennies”. As witness the recent deadly Amtrak derailment, caused by “republican” budget cuts. Said budget cuts have slowed down improvements that could have prevented the accident:

One key safety feature was missing from the stretch of tracks where an Amtrak passenger train going more than 100 mph derailed and killed seven people.

Investigators say that if positive train control had been installed on that stretch, the technology could have automatically slowed the train down and perhaps saved lives.

Another GOP budget-cutting spree resulted in engineers being forced to work more and sleep less.

Accident investigators have been unwilling to speculate on whether operator error or mechanical problems led to Tuesday’s deadly Amtrak derailment. But for months, members of the labor union representing locomotive engineers have complained that recent reductions in rest and downtime could lead to tragedy. “You need to be able to have some kind of chance to get off the equipment, turn your mind off for a while,” said Fritz Edler, a veteran engineer who wrote a scathing letter last December to Amtrak managers on behalf the Brotherhood of Locomotive Engineers and Trainmen. 

The letter accused Amtrak of forcing “dangerous changes” in the scheduling of engineers that have had the effect of reducing rest time in between trips to Washington, D.C. and New York City. 

“Forcing shorter breaks, day after day, between runs increases fatigue related risk and the potential for loss of focus,” the letter warned. 

But do the Elephants care? Nope. Within a few hours of the deaths that they helped cause, they passed even bigger budget cuts. Yes. They really did. Boehner and Co. are so blase’ about killing people, they stole even MORE taxpayer money to give to their fat-cat buddies, before their victims’ bodies had yet been given a decent burial.

Gentle Reader, we all know that stuff costs money. Trains, tracks, engineers, safety equipment, all of these things COST MONEY. Congress steals money from Amtrak just to hand it to a load of their billionaire cronies, regardless of whether or not the people whose taxes they stole live or die. Those budget cuts aren’t just numbers on a spreadsheet: they are actions that have consequences. Consequences such as dead people.

“Republicans” Do. Not. Care. Not about anything but themeselves and the bastards who have bought them. Greedy, murderous motherf***ing Teapublicans.

Get on out, and vote them out. Before they kill you or yours with budget cuts, like they did those commuters on Amtrak.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

Ebola to Republicans: “Thank you!”

Mr. Ebola Virus held a surprise press conference yesterday, as you all know by now. Speaking and secreting to a room full of reporters, many of them sketchily covered in makeshift protective gear, Ebola lauded the American “Republican” party for their assistance in spreading himself across multiple countries in a short period of time. But enough of me yakkin’, let’s hear what the Virus himself had to say:

“Thank you all for coming on such short notice, I appreciate it. I gotta say, I am getting too much credit for the death and mayhem I have wrought upon West Africa, and now America too. It’s unfair of you to not give props to those awesome Teapublicans in America. Their budget cuts in the past helped degrade the world’s ability to fight me, and even better for me, they are still refusing to spend money to fight me.

It’s helping me, no question about it. They throw money at terrorists and such, but leave me free to murder and terrorize at will. It’s not bragging to predict that I will kill thousands more people this year than those pathetic loons in ISIS and Al-Qaida put together, and I couldn’t do it without pig-ignorant, medieval morons like Boehner, Inhofe and Vitter shafting the CDC, NIH, WHO, and everybody else who needed resources to prepare for my assault on the human race.

That’s all I had to say, really. Please keep ignoring me, don’t listen to experts, panic all you want, I live for that. And vote Republican, they are my biggest supporters!”

Sounds like “mission accomplished” once again, doesn’t it?

Mr. Blunt and Cranky