Mr. Blunt and Cranky has had a epiphany, and an enormous one if he does say so himself (and he does, yes he does): he has found something that Congress is actually good for. This might seem counter-intuitive, as our national legislators are aggressive, brainless, greedy, full of rage and bloodlust; indeed, they act purely out of rapacious instinct,with  no thought for anyone else’s welfare eave their own.

“So how,” we hear you ask, “is there anything good to be said about such wretched creatures?”. The answer is not so much in their being good: rather, it is the benefit we may gain from their manifold shortcomings:

Congresscritters and Senators would be the perfect defense against the Zombie Apocalypse. Think of it, people: zombies invade the Capitol and one of two things happen: they sense the absence of brains, and starve to death; or they sense a building full of a different sort of zombie, and  live peacefully among their own kind thereafter, two tribes of brainless sub-humans who are cut from the same rotten, moldy old cloth.

Yes, we just trick the zombies as they are apocalypsing, point them to Washington D.C., clear out the civilians in their path, and when all are present and accounted for build a huge honkin’ wall around Dizzy City. Then we in the rest of America can live happily ever after.

Hey, it’s not much, but at least we are starting the week on a somewhat positive note for a change.

Mr. B & C