Republicans: The Yappy Purse-Dog Party

We’ve all dealt with these little s***s – the aggressiveness, the noise, the bites on the ankles. And as soon as you raise your hand to shoo them away, they run back to hide behind the skirts of their owners, still barking the while. Said owners then either praise the dog, offer you insincere apologies, or both.

Of course, it isn’t really the dog’s fault- it’s the owner who should get the blame. Good owners make for good dogs, and bad owners make for bad dogs. So it is with dogs and political parties.

The “Republican” party is owned by wingnut ideologues, single-issue primary voters, and money-mad financiers. When you think about it that way, the yapping and ankle-biting activities of Repube Politicos and Pundits make perfect sense. They have been trained (and in some cases, bred) by their owners to get in the way, raise a ruckus, distract, annoy, and cause damage. So that is what they do.

To continue the analogy, little dogs CAN be awesome. This writer has encountered some super-sweet Poms, Shih Tzus and suchlike. These good dogs are always those who have been blessed with good pet owners. And again, politicians fit that same mold. A politico who is “owned” by his or her constituency, and trained to follow the Constitution and to live in the real world will be a true public servant.

We should all pick our politicians based on who owns them and how they were trained.  Same as we do our mutts. Politicos may not be as cute as dogs and they’ll never be as loyal: but their yapping tends to be a lot louder, and the bites of, say, a Congresscritter, can really tear us up.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

If You’re Not Living in a Wilderness, Then Fix Your D***ed Pet, Already

Meet Ramses, the Cranky cat : the Cranky family rescued him from a shelter some years back. He is obese, arthritic, and an awesome lap cat. He lives indoors and thus is protected from coyotes and such: he is also neutered and microchipped, because we don’t live in a wilderness.

Meet Luna, the Blunt dog (decidedly not cranky, but one must make allowances): the Cranky family rescued her from a rescue organization three years back. She is happy, energetic and dumber than half a box of rocks. She lives indoors and outdoors, and is protected from predators and passing cars: she is also spayed and microchipped, because we do not live in a wilderness.

Meet an anonymous dead kitten who got run over on a street. It never got a name, never saw a vet, probably never ate much of anything, and died young because we do not live in a wilderness.

The only difference between the fates of these animals is the degree of responsibility taken by humans. The first two were taken in by responsible people, and third was not. Odds are the kitten was born to an adult cat belonging to some stupid, irresponsible f*** who doesn’t care about their critters. Or worse, some loon who thinks that dogs and cats are “wild” animals who need to live according to “nature”.

News flash: almost none of us live in “nature”. We humans have pretty much annihilated it, replacing it with an environment suited to humans, and not at all suited to animals. Dogs and cats were not created to contend with concrete, asphalt, and the vehicles that fly across such roadways. They were not created to cope with the loss of habitat that provided their distant ancestors with food and lodging.

If your animal does not live in a wilderness, you can’t treat it like a wild animal. It lives in an artificial environment that ill-suits it. It cannot survive and thrive in this alien mess we have made of the natural world, unless we take the steps required to help it do so. That means immunizing, keeping them safe, and spay/neuter. For every animal we “own”.

People need to nut up and take responsibility for our animals, and the hash we’ve made of the planet.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky