Attention all violent extremists: take your death threats and shove ’em up your kazoos.

Assuming you can get them past your heads, that is.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky got another threat from a Right wingnut yesterday in response to this post. Here is the stupid-f*** blowhard’s idiotic, infantile screed, submitted using someone else’s name and via a bogus AOL account:

One of the main reasons we should not go to war, not only now but anytime soon, is because Obama is an incompetent idiot. In facts, all liberals are incompetent idiots. If North Korea were to row over in canoes and invade the USA, and there’s a Dem/liberal in office, we should just let them do what they want. Anything democrats and libs would want to do would only be another screw up.

Putin is more intelligent than Obama can ever hope to be. At least until 2017, we’re stuck with a prez in office that’s as stupid as that ******idiot at DU, and you can’t get any more stupid than him. In fact, ** better watch his mouth in response to this or he might just wake up one day to find out he’s dead. Got it, jackass? No, I’m not fucking kidding.

Judging from the IP address, this is either Born-Again Bill in a different location, or a kissing cousin of his. And his pathetic diatribe is as good an example of why this blog is needed as any: violent extremism in all of its forms, no matter the reason or cause, is wrong. And my writing promulgates the antithesis of the “reasoning” behind violent, extreme, “revolutionary” people and their organizations.

Radical Centrism is, in large part, the renunciation of murderous means in service of ideologies; both those I agree with, and those with whom I do not agree. Said extremism being exemplified here. This cyber-bullying skidmark on the Tightie-Whities of American Politics, with his stupid and impotent threats and fantasies of murdering anyone who does not agree with him 24/7/365, is well deserving of being flipped off, with a Bronx cheer as accompaniment.

Bullies should never be allowed to succeed, and unlike the kind and gentle practices advocated these days, your humble correspondent is a firm believer in whooping right back on that bully’s ass. This wussy-boy assassin wannabee who cowers behind other peoples’ identities whilst broadcasting ineffectual threats of bodily harm and death is just another bully. And an example of everything that is wrong with America in the modern age.

Instead of promising to kill a writer with whom he disagrees, the needledicked yutz could simply not f***ing read this blog. That is how free speech works: we have the right to speak, and we also have the right to not listen. There is no need to kill someone we don’t agree with: just ignore them. Problem solved, without first-degree murder having been committed.

Of course, the relevant authorities have been alerted, as well as AOL and the individual this toerag was impersonating. Including IP and email addresses and all that jazz. Not that I believe he has the testiclar fortitude to actually carry out his jackass threats, but it’s always a good idea to have the cops on your side when whackos rear their butt-ugly heads.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

A simple way YOU can fix Congress: Vote in Primary Elections

Mr. Blunt and Cranky was driving home from The Place That Pays Him To Go There yesterday, and was listening to the news (because really, be honest, 95% of the “music” on radio is either old stuff you’ve  heard too many times already, or new stuff that you hate), and heard a story about the polarization and radicalization of Congress (link below). Here’s the important bit: the reason that “Republican” legislators listen only to the Raging Righties in their Tightie Whities is because those are the voters who show up and vote in primary elections. And you can’t win a general election if you don’t win the primaries.

http://www.npr.org/player/v2/mediaPlayer.html?action=1&t=1&islist=false&id=230976609&m=230989354

What this means is that only loons and extremists can get elected to a “Republican” seat in the House or Senate (this does not apply to Dems, since there are no Loony Lefties in elected office anymore, and haven’t been for years): the voters they have to satisfy are as crazy or crazier than the nutballs they elect. And whoever turns out in November will probably vote for whichever party the candidate is labeled with.

It also means that a cycle is created, with candidates growing ever more partisan, to try to out-wingnut each other, so the party base becomes ever more wingnuttified with each passing year. Like any media campaign that relies on ever-increasing hype, the Repubs are forever ramping up the level of crazy in order to appease the teeny tiny but very vocal “base” of their party. If they don’t, they’ll lose the next primary, lose the next election, lose their cushy government jobs, and have to return to the real world and have to earn an honest living. Such a prospect is anathema to any elected official, and terrifying to boot.

The only way to break this cycle of ever-increasing insanity is for sensible, normal, rational Americans to vote in primary elections. Even if you’re not a party member, you can pick the one that is closest to you and vote for the sensible grownup who is running for a particular office, and by so doing kick the crazy wingnut candidate to the curb. It’s simple, takes less than an hour, and solves the root cause of DC’s problems.

Simple, easy, cheap, not a hardship, solves the problem. How often can you literally say you helped save the country in such a manner? If enough of us do this, we can end partisan gridlock, stop all these phony-baloney crises, and have a Congress that truly represents the majority of Americans. Because right now, it represents a minority.

Congress will represent the people who can put them into office and remove them from office. Those people are primary voters. Let’s all be  primary voters. And take our country back from the crazies.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

Tough S*** Ohio, You Voted For These A**Hats

“Elections have consequences”. Trite but true, and Ohio is the latest example. In 2010, a lot of Fundagelicals, Raging Righties and other “Republican” voters went to the polls, while a lot of Lefties, Progressives and other Democrats sat it out, or just kinda sorta showed up and voted. The result?

Ohio turned into a Red State. 100% “Republican” controlled, in all three branches of state government. And like all modern “Republicans”, they are doing what they do. Witness the most recent budget signed by The Kasich, containing (among other atrocities):

• a number of unconstitutional anti-abortion laws,
• a huge tax increase on the middle and lower classes,
• a huge tax cut for the upper classes,
• near-elimination of health care services for women,
• more stealing of taxpayer dollars for his cronies at JobsOhio,
• even more stealing of taxpayer dollars for unaccountable charter schools, and
• further cuts to the poor and working poor.

News flash, fellow Buckeyes: it’s our f***ing fault. We voted a bunch of right-wing demagogues into office and handed them complete and total control of all aspects of our lives. And if you didn’t vote for them, most of you either didn’t vote against them, or didn’t do much besides show up and lethargically push the little buttons on the touch-screen device.

Think back a wee bit:

• In 2008, massive and enthusiastic participation by the Left, Progressives and Centrists: Right Winguts got their asses beat like drums.
• In 2010, massive and enthusiastic participation by the Right Wingnuts; Lefties, Progressives and Centrists got their asses beat like drums.
• In 2012, massive and enthusiastic participation by the Left, Progressives and Centrists: Right Wingnuts got their asses beat like drums.

See a pattern here, people?

Kudos to those few Ohioans who actually did some activism during the 2010 election. But to the rest of us, shut your pie-holes: this is what happens when you let a bunch of batsh***-crazy lunatic wingnuts run things.

Yep, that means we all lose. Own it, learn from it, and do better next time.

And if you’re not from Ohio, learn from our mistakes.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

 

Lying Sack of S*** of the Week

Mr. Blunt and Cranky never listens to talk radio – the constant ads for herbal Viagra, tax cheating services, fake gems and other “products” are just too annoying, regardless of how amusing the chatterer may be. So he is relying on “news” reports for this week’s winner.

An opinionator named Barbara Espinosa (no idea which party or wing thereof she prefers) referred to President Obama as a “monkey”, and followed that ever-so-erudite bon mot with “I voted for the white guy”; after which she insisted that she was not a racist. (“With a last name of Espinosa I’m anything but racist”, was her alleged proof of non-bias.)

Some quick google-icious activity will  reveal  http://sonoranalliance.com/2012/06/11/neither-laurie-roberts-or-kathy-petsas-called-the-arizona-republican-party/comment-page-1/#comment-869072  wherein one can read her post-rant bilge.

The notion that being part of a “minority” group renders one free of racist tendencies is patently false: there are blacks who hate whites, jews who hate arabs, and so on.  Lots of people are proud racists, some are closet racists, some are in denial, some try not to be, and a very few are not racist at all. But one is not guaranteed to be free of racism merely by family heritage.

The biggest liars are those who lie to themselves. Ms. Espinosa has by word and deed proven herself to be a racist who lies to herself and others about it. A most worthy recipient of this week’s Crown O’ Polished Turds, the award given to the LSoSoTW.

Mr. B & C

When “Never” Actually Means “Until I Change My Idiot Mind”

Rep. Andy Gipson (R-Sphincterville) recently said, via Leviticus (20:13 for those of you aren’t hip to the Scrip) on his Facebook page, that gays should be killed. Here’s a snip of the page, for you Thomas-types out there:

Later, he went on Facebook again, refusing to apologize, saying “I do not, cannot, and will not apologize for the inspired truth of God’s Word. It is one thing that will never change.” So, you’re down with killing the gayward. We got it, Andy. You might be a hateful little bigot, but you are at least consistent. God’s word will never change, thus you’ll never be OK with gay folks unless they are dead.  Despicable, but reliable. We know where you stand. Even if it’s the lower level of a two-story outhouse, we know where you stand.

One wondered if he refused to wear nylon and wool at the same time (one shudders at the thought of a poly/cotton mix – oh, the shame, the shame of it); sold his daughters into slavery, or indeed  performed each and every one of the other actions required of we poor souls,  in that unchanging book that is Leviticus. If not, how could he live with himself?

And then, shock of all shocks, the next day, he said he didn’t really mean “killed”. Wait a minute, boyo, you mean God’s word DID change? News to me, I have to say.  Or did you mean that you just decided to stop following it? So much for “never”. 

Most of us think never means, well, never. Evidently, this jackanapes thinks never means “until I am in danger of actually having to work for a living”. Or “Until I realize what an ass I’ve made of myself”.

Nope, here’s the deal: he’s just another lying, two-faced politician who got caught shooting off his yap. His word isn’t worth the spit behind it, and his promises are worth their weight in gold.

If it weren’t the fact that he was using the Bible to make himself look bigger than the pathetic little twerp that he actually is, he might “never” have been noticed at all.

Mr. B & C

If You Don’t Know the Meaning of a Word, Don’t Use the Word

People often tag politicians with labels that may or may not fit.  Sometimes they are exaggerations, sometimes they are accurate, and sometimes they leave one scratching one’s head.  Following are three definitions, and two Prexies to whom one or more of the labels have been applied:

Nazi:  shorthand for “National Socialist German Worker’s Party”; believed in the inferiority of Jews, Gyspys, Blacks, and pretty much anybody who wasn’t  a lily-white Aryan; also that when in doubt, ask yourself “What Would Adolph Do?”

Communist: member or supporter of the Communist Party; believes in a theory or system of social organization based on the holding of all property in common, actual ownership being ascribed to the community as a whole or to the state.

Socialist: An advocate or believer in socialism; a theory or system of social organization that advocates the vesting of the ownership and control of the means of production and distribution, of capital, land, etc., in the community as a whole.

A whole helluva lot of people used to call Gee Dubya Bush a Nazi. Pretty clearly, he was not (yes, yes, we all know about the family history. Mr. Blunt and Cranky’s paternal grandfather used to run factories that made tanks in WWII, but he can neither build nor drive a tank himself.  Not everything gets handed down via DNA, ya know.), but people said it anyway, even though it was and is patently obvious that he is not a Nazi.

Quite a few people call Barack Obama one or all of the three. Pretty clearly, he is not.  If he were a Nazi, he would have to consider himself at least half-inferior. If he were either a commie or a socialist, he wouldn’t have kept the piles of money he has made over the years. Nonetheless, people say it anyway, even though it was and is patently obvious that he is none of these three things.

Disliking politicians is a venerated and longstanding practice, and this writer likes to think he does it well. He also likes to think he picks labels that actually make a wee bit of sense, and that match up with the actual meanings of the labels. But then, Mr. B & C rarely watches network “news” programs and never listens to the pundits on talk radio, so he has an advantage in that he gets less propaganda and fewer lies crammed into his skull on a daily basis.

Plus, he reads a friggin’ dictionary when he wants to know the meaning of a word.

Next time: What do they mean when they say “never”?

Americans Elect Wouldn’t Know a Centrist if It Bit Them on Their Arses

So it seems that Americans Elect has no one to elect and so is folding its tents, skulking off into that not-so-good night. The only thing that surprises this writer is that AE is surprised. But then, a bunch of beltway boys and elitist dweebs cannot be expected to truly understand what the majority wants; so Mr. Blunt and Cranky must admit, he was wrong in expecting them to have spent time on Planet American Reality in the first place.

Americans Elect operated under what they called a “premise”, and most of us would call “an un-researched assumption”: that what all we poor, unwashed Centrist Independents want is a budget-cutting demon who is socially moderate.  If you’re an out-of-touch member of the punditocracy or a frustrated party apparatchik who is looking for a less extreme candidate, you could be forgiven for thinking so – it is frequently heard inside of your echo chambers, after all. But maybe you should have stepped outside the bubble and asked some real Americans what we think, because it turns out we are not so simple and monolithic as you imagine.

Leaving aside the absurdly quixotic nature of what these fools say they are trying to do (change the way we elect our Prexies overnight via the Interwebbie thing); their understanding of their target audience is so far off the mark, it makes Dick Cheney’s marksmanship look good. Two things to explain: Centrists are not all alike; Independents are not all alike.

Centrists come in all flavors, and can pretty much include anyone who isn’t clinging to the extreme ends of the wings; hoping their nuts don’t loosen too much, lest they fall off completely. There’s center-left, center-right, and so on. If you’re not Lenin or Limbaugh, you might be able to attach a “C” to your identifier, at least for some audiences. So, there is a whole rainbow of Centrist possibilities to consider, and to apply a narrow definition as AE did is beyond pig-ignorance.

As to Independents, Mr. B & C can do no better than to quote Hermey and Rudolph: “Let’s go be independent together!”  Yup, the very idea of an “Independent Party” is so ludicrous, it was a punch line in a 60’s kiddie cartoon. Unified Independents? C’mon, pass around whatever it is you’re smoking, let us all have a hit.

This writer loves the idea of a Centrist President, and maybe he can vote for one before he croaks. But it won’t happen because a bunch of pissed-off policy wonks and partisans play at being Centrists. It will only happen when a plurality of Americans reject the partisan premise, and focus instead on that old-timey “we the people” idea.

Next Time: Legislators Gone Wild (Not porn. [Well, maybe it is.])

Mr. B & C

Interlude: When an Apology Isn’t an Apology

When someone isn’t sorry for something they did, there is a typical pattern to their “apology”: something on the order of “I’m sorry YOU blahblahblahbittyblah”. When someone is sorry for something they have done, the pattern is more along the lines of “I’m sorry I blahblahblahbittyblah”. We have all been on the receiving end of both types during our lives, no doubt, and know this well.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky was on the receiving end of one of the insincere variety lately, and to the offender’s “I’m sorry you’re upset” replied “I’m sorry you’re an asshole”. What struck him at that point was that the perp didn’t realize that they had done something wrong in the first place, but most certainly did realize that they had just had a non-apology delivered back to them.

Some people are so disconnected from society that they don’t empathize with others. Some, for whatever reason, have never learned that there are consequences for actions they take – for themselves and those that are injured by said actions. They sometimes place so little importance on the feelings and value of other humans that they may not even remember harming them in the past.

When Jane Fonda behaved in a hugely and stupidly insensitive, near-treasonous fashion (to put it mildly) during the Vietnam war, she refused to apologize for years, and when she did, her first attempt at an apology was of the insincere sort; small wonder that many Vietnam veterans despise her to this day.

Mitt Romney was recently called out for his behavior during high school, and like Fonda, issued a non-apology: “I’ve seen the reports, not going to argue about that; I did some stupid things in high school,” he said. “If I hurt anyone I would be very sorry for it and apologize for it.”

Breaking it down – It obvious that someone was hurt (via the word of multiple eyewitnesses, some of whom were participants in one event), so why the hypothetical “If” and “would”? Mitt (like many other deliverers of false apologies) has just shown that he doesn’t even remember having done wrong, and clearly doesn’t feel remorse for the wrongs that he has done.

If one were the victim of such actions, one would not be appeased by such greasy insincerity; indeed, the average person would be even angrier with the perpetrators after being treated in such a manner. In both cases, most of the media gave them a pass, but lots of Americans haven’t, because we know bullshit non-apologies when we hear them. Both Fonda and Romney would have been better served by showing an honest understanding of the error of their ways, and simply saying ‘I did wrong, and I am sorry. How can I make amends?” As would we all.

Mr. B & C

(Link to pile of badly-written crap)

As one might expect, there are some extremists who worry about losing this or that electoral contest this fall. Among those wackjobs we find the Greene County VA Republican Party, whose newsletteradvocates armed revolution should Obama win re-election in 2012. You’ll find the ignorant screed (penned by the editor himself) on Page 7, in the lower right-hand corner.

This newsletter’s editorial staff are clearly crybabies, possessed also of seditious, violent, un-American tendencies (and the apparent absence of Spellcheck).  Come on, grow up. And if you lose, fight harder and smarter next time. But don’t act like terrorists and start a war if your stupid, useless political party loses a single race to the other stupid, useless political party.

Newsflash to all extremists: you are not entitled to a 100% winning record. No one is. Sometimes you win, and sometimes you lose. If you aren’t sufficiently mature to understand this basic fact of life, this writer suggests you ask Mommy to buy you a new binky.  You can then go cry in a corner, muffling the inane talk of violence with your pacifier.

Mr. B & C.