Archives for posts with tag: fundagelical

Guest blogger CoffeeCat offers up the single most powerful piece of writing on the Duggar mess:
Iceberg families like mine; like the Duggars.

My family of origin was similar to the Duggars–and similar to an iceberg. What we showed the public was the surface ten percent. When the doors were closed and no one was looking–our family members played our life out in the submerged dark waters that made up the remaining, unseen 90 percent. It’s where I spent my childhood and adolescence. 

There was hitting. There was slapping. There was emotional abuse. Their was spiritual abuse. There was degradation and name calling and screaming. And sexual abuse. 

We had to keep up appearances. We were a “religious family” and how we looked and how we acted to the outside world, were tantamount. 

I understand the Duggar family. I wish I didn’t. I know what it is like to be a victim of sexual abuse. I know what it is like to feel pressure to project an image of perfection and happiness–and to be dying on the inside. I know what it is like to feel like a nothing. Like the only reason you exist is to be an extension of your parents’ reputations. We existed to satisfy their egos and to ensure that the neighbors, the country-club members, the business colleagues and the church members–thought positively of our family. “Oh you guys have such a nice family!” “Wow, what great parents who have! Aren’t you lucky.” I heard it all the time. 

I know what it is like to never get help and to be forced to hide pain. I was hospitalized ten times–between the ages of five and 12–for acute bladder infections. Hospitalized. Put under anesthesia, because the experts didn’t understand why I had constant bladder infections. I grew up eating antibiotics crushed in peanut butter. I remember trying so hard to be good. To be better. If only I wasn’t so bad, the abuse would stop. 

I remember having to sacrifice my humanity–by remaining silent. By remaining an object. I remained a nothing–to ensure that the abusers were never caught. So I remained a silent, nothing object, because my abusers were my parents and I wanted their love. I was trauma bonded to them. They were all I knew. 

Our entire family should have been in therapy. We were all hurting. In silence. When my sister was hospitalized for an eating disorder, we were supposed to get family therapy. My father was angry with me one day. Because I was bad, my sister would not be getting family therapy. He blamed me. My father did everything to avoid therapy. My sister abused alcohol, I punched my hand threw a window and wanted to die and my brother tried to commit suicide. It was all hidden. Our pain was not only ignored, it was an aggravation because it threatened to reveal what was really happening. If my father could have–he would have sent us away to a family friend who built houses, too. Therapy was avoided at all costs, because it wasn’t truth and healing they wanted–but silence. That perfect shellacked exterior that served them so well. 

A sinister coincidence is that my father also had a police-officer friend who was a child molester. This “friend” took pictures of me and molested me. It’s been very hard to read about the child pornographers, molesters and abusers that surround the Duggar family. This is not coincidence. Trust me. These people have a way of finding each other. And when they’re in trouble, they seek out “likeminded” dysfunctionals–because they know they will also hide their sick secrets. 

As painful as it is to admit–I acted out sexually as a child. I remember one incident when I was 10. I had repressed that this had happened, and the memory surfaced when I was 30. I called the child that this happened with. He verified that indeed, it had. I fell on my knees when he said it happened when I was 13 and he was 8. I wrote him a five page letter, telling him that I believed his account and that what I had done was not his fault. I invited him into my own therapist’s office, to help him heal and to reiterate that he was not at fault. I have never gotten over this. I still have no memory of my actions at age 13, but I die every day just thinking that I could have done something like that. 

When the news about Josh Duggar doing this came out, I knew at once—that he had been abused. Most likely by his father. This was not sexual curiosity. This was a stunted teenager acting out abuse dynamics that had been done to him. He was recycling the abuser/abusee situation. He picked those who were weaker and less powerful than he–because that was what was done to him. 

Minimizing what Josh has done and clamoring for the show to return–is the ultimate injustice. He needs help. He has his own children now. Ignoring what he has done or making excuses–is a crime. 

The girls in the family who were sexually abused and forced to live with their abuser–most likely have PTSD now. And the Duggars are forcing them to be interviewed by Fox this Friday. These girls are robots, at this point. Just like I was. They’ve been programmed to protect the family, to be silent and to stuff down their own humanity until it shrinks into a sliver of nothing. They’ll smile. Just as I did. They’ll praise their parents, just as I did. They’ll claim that they forgive. Just as I did. Because that’s the program instilled in every neuron since preschool. Silence equals love and it’s the price of admission if you want mommy and daddy’s love. What choice do you have? You’re all ready broken in a million pieces–a nothing. The only thing you have is what little love (as sick as it is) you were given by people who regard you as an object. You’re a piece of furniture to them. However, you cling to it–the only life raft you’ve ever experienced during a lifelong tsunami event. 

I only hope the show is cancelled and that the talk of spin-offs is just a perverse rumor. Those girls are victims who have not even begun to face their pain. A spin-off, featuring sexual abuse victims who never got help–is nothing more than a sad crime scene with victims who only know how to perpetuate the lie. 

I cringe when right-wingers or Christians defend this family, their behavior and what happened. The minimizing, the rationalizations, the denial and the justifications–are all pedophile thinking. “He made a mistake.” “God forgives him” “Every family has problems and no family is perfect.” I’ve heard all of this. It was how the abusers in our family kept us quiet, submissive and sick. It was how they kept their secrets safe. I remember my father telling me that anytime I was mad at him to picture Jesus next to him–because Jesus loved everyone. I remember after our family saw the movie Parenthood with Steve Martin. My father remarked, as we walked to the car, “See. All families have problems.” 

I hate to see average people perpetuating these toxic, sick messages. They are gifts to abusers and pedophiles. People might not realize that they are carrying water for pedophiles, but they absolutely are, when they minimize the pain of abuse victims and the significance of what Josh did, and how his parents covered it up and ignored the pain of their own son and daughters. 

The Duggars are an iceberg family, just as my family of origin was an iceberg family. I escaped. I have a good life with my wonderful child and husband, but it took ten years of therapy to unravel the damage. There are many iceberg families out there. I’ve heard their stories in group therapy–but it is especially painful to hear the excuses and the minimizing from people who are only reinforcing the notion that this family is fine just the way it is. 

The Duggars are not victims of the media or the police who released the report. This family is lucky that we don’t know the full truth–and they damn well know it. They are not victims of anyone. They are a victim factory. These parents created victims that are now growing into adults that are unhealed. They are now having children who may become sexual abuse victims. The extent of the damage and pain that these parents have caused cannot be overestimated. Many generations will suffer because of them. 

In the end, I hope that the show is cancelled and that this forces at least some Duggar members to find their way to help–so that they can stop living on the surface of an iceberg crafted by abusers–and start living a whole, authentic life on their own terms. 

There is life beyond the prison of the surface ten percent.
Thanks to CoffeeCat for bravely writing this piece. Remember: It ain’t about politics, and it ain’t about religion: it’s about abused children.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

The “Christian Right” is starting into its annual festive tizzy about how Baby Jesus is being dissed due to people uttering words other than “Merry Christmas” during the period of time between Halloween and New Year’s Eve. In reality, of course, there is no such “war on Christmas”, and has never been. You want the real story on the annual celebration? Here ya go:

When the weather gets cold and the days get short, people like to have a party, to lift their spirits. It’s been going on for, literally, thousands of years, all over the planet. Vis. and to wit:

In ancient Rome, it was called Saturnalia (or Dies Natalis Solis Invicti).
Modern American Hindus celebrate Pancha Ganapati.
Vainakhs celebrated Malkh.
Saxons celebrated Mōdraniht.
European-descended Pagans have a Yule holiday.
Persian-descended Pagans celebrate Shabe Yaldā.
Christians, of course, have Christmas.
The jewish people celebrate Hanukkah.
Slavic folk have been known to observe Malanka.

To name but a few. Get the idea? When all around is dark and dreary, we humans like to have some light and merriment.

So just because Christian missionairies in the British Isles decided to adapt some Celtic Pagan observances by inventing a birthday celebration for Rebbe Yeshuah Bar Joseph (AKA Jesus), and just because we Christian types happen to be in the majority in contemporary America, doesn’t mean other people in and from other cultures don’t have a right to party in the manner of their own choosing. We all need a bit of a pick-me-up when nature has us feeling down.

It’s gotten worse since Fundagelicals have decided to repurpose the celebratory holiday of Christmas into yet another evangelical outlet; because when religious people are looking for converts, they can get pretty militant. (See the Albigensian Crusade for another example besides the current ones.) Songs like “Mary, Did You Know” are perfect examples of this phenomenon. It’s no longer enough to wish the Savior a happy birthday and give gifts and charity to others: no, these proselytizeing latter-day Puritans are after your very souls. Damn your fun, they are on a mission!

Everybody, just take a breath and smile. Drive away the chill and dark with warmth and light. It’s what humans do. All of us. For all of our history. This writer loves the opportunity to liven up the blah days of a blah season, and doesn’t care what you call your party.

Call it “Bob”, if you want. It might prevent a few wars, or a few Fox News editorials at the very least. The reason for the season is: to help ourselves and those around us to be a wee bit happier.

So Happy Bob to one and all.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

Here is the latest in a flurry of non-reality-based memes on the subject:

How wrong is it? Let us count the ways:
Number A: they are free to say grace over their meal. Nobody ever said they couldn’t. But the meme falsely implies that they are bravely taking a stand against some mythical oppressor who seeks to stop their prayer. There is, of course, no such oppressor, but that fact matters not at all to the Fundagelicals.
Letter 2: see anybody there pelting these hard-working public servants with atheistic tracts? Nope. Most Americans don’t much care who you pray to, when, how or why.
Thirdly: assuming that the promulgators of this meme consider themselves to be Christians, they should read Rebbe Yeshuah bar Joseph’s words in Matthew:6. You know, the words about not being phony and ostentatious in their prayer.

Odds are, the people depicted had nothing to do with the meme: just people saying grace before a meal. Good on them. It’s their right to do so.

The problem is with the yahoo prostletyzers who are using this ordinary picture to try and enforce their wingnut agendas on the rest of us. This writer wishes they’d spend more time reading their Constitutions and less trying to subvert it.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

This skidmark on the underwear of Christianity clearly has a great rack: IMG_1809.JPG

But having a nice pair up there isn’t enough validation for this preacherman. Evidently, he has an issue with female chests-perhaps because he secretly envies them? A sort of competitive instinct at work?

Whatever the reasons, this Fundagelical nutbar hates female nudity, and makes no bones about it.

An Ohio pro-family anti-abortion activist wants to ban all public nudity, including public breastfeeding, not just because he has a problem with female nudity, but because he’s convinced that it leads to “gay pride.”

Patrick Johnson, who’s the director of Personhood Ohio, called for a ban on all public nudity after topless dancers from a gentleman’s club protested at his church in support of strip clubs. Johnson’s church has campaigned against strip clubs and harassed customers for years.

“I am sick that women can legally bare their breasts to children and to married men against their will in Ohio,” Johnson wrote on his Facebook page after the protest.  He then told ABC, “I think when we allow women to flaunt their sexuality to the public, flaunt their nudity to the public, it’s harmful to marriage.”

First of all, “skin” is not “sexuality”. Whether it’s ol’ Patty Johnson that is mowing the grass while shirtless, flaunting his C-cup Man-boobies, or a suburban housewife who mows her grass shirtless because it’s too hot to do otherwise doesn’t make the lawn mowing a sex act. It’s just people taking care of the yard.

Nor is breastfeeding a sex act: if it were, a lot of people would be guilty of incest. Nope, it’s just a cheap and healthy way to feed an infant.

Male skin is not inherently less sexual than female skin (ask any gay man if you don’t believe it). Female skin is not necessarily sexier than male skin, either. It’s just the stuff that keeps all of our internal organs from falling onto the floor at inopportune moments. Hiding it serves no purpose.

Now, in this cretin’s diseased, violent, paranoid little brain, perhaps skin is sexualized. But since the rest of us are fortunate enough to not live in his brain, its contents should not dictate our actions. If he hates women and/or their breasts, he should Just. Not. Look. At. Them.

He has all the boobies he could ever want already, anyhow.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

The Battle of Gettysburg was an example of Stupid America at its stupidest: a load of greedy, narrow-minded, ideological, partisan s***sacks decided to wage war on the other half of the country so they could be free to oppress a group of people (slaves, in that case). In the end, those the Confederates wanted to enslave won their freedom, the Yanks beat the Rebels’ asses like a drum, and a lot of innocent schmucks got their lives ruined or ended: all so a bunch of fat cats could get even fatter at the expense of their constituents.

But just in case you think America has gotten over its affliction of Stupid Syndrome, you should know that we have a new and even dumber load of greedy, narrow-minded, ideological, partisan s***sacks who want to, yep, wage war on the rest of us so as to be able to oppress a group of people (broadly speaking, anyone who is not a while male Dominionist “Christian” “Republican”). Then as now, these people are treasonous, anti-American scumbuckets who want to overthrow our government. And then as now, all too many of us are not paying attention.

Here, in their own words, you can read their call to arms. And this is a literal call to arms – they mean to grab weapons and start killing people so as to make America into a theocracy. Don’t believe the Cranky One? Read these quotes from David Lane, an adviser to Michele Bachmann, Newt Gingrich, Rick Perry, and Rand Paul:

“You ask, “What is our goal?” To wage war to restore America to our Judeo-Christian heritage with all of our might and strength that God will give us.”

Or perhaps you’d prefer some Peter J. Leithart:

“If America is to be put in its place – put right – Christians must risk martyrdom and force Babel to the crux where it has to decide either to acknowledge Jesus an imperator and the church as God’s imperium or to begin drinking holy blood.”

Yes, that’s right: these “Republicans” want to force you to “drink holy blood”. And lots of you voted for them. Lots of you will vote for them AGAIN. That is Stupid America raised to levels of stupidity hitherto unimagined.

Today we should remember the brave Civil War soldiers who were killed on behalf of ideological extremists who had built their fortunes of the bones of people they had enslaved. Ask yourselves this question: what is the best way to honor their sacrifice? Is it:

Number A: repeating the errors of the past by launching a second civil war and attempting to overthrow a duly constituted government, or

Letter 2: coming together as a nation by rejecting these calls for violence, inequality, hatred, treason and wholesale bloodshed.

This writer picks the second option, and hopes you will also.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

Anyone who has spent time in business or the military knows the difference between strategy and tactics, and that some positions should be occupied by tacticians and some by strategists. Unfortunately, politics seems to be infested with the wrong sorts of people in the wrong sorts of roles. This is why our country is so severely f***ed up.

The Right Wing (which has controlled the “Republican” party since the late 1970’s) is composed primarily of two groups of people: profiteers and Fundagelical “Christans”. Both of these groups are fundamentally incapable of long-term strategic thinking.

Profiteers are concerned with maximizing short-term financial gain. They are not concerned with the long-term stability or viability of the economy, be it macro or micro, local or global. Regrettably, many Right-Wing business types have been “helping” our government with business regulation for decades now.

Fundagelical “Christians” (“fundies”) are convinced that Jesus will at any moment (probably very soon) rapture all the fundies up to heaven where they will dwell in an eternal paradise. For this reason, they do not concern themselves with destructive policies, starving babies, global climate change, and so on. They, after all, will not be around to deal with such problems.

Both of these types of people (some among the Right fall into both categories) are not fully in touch with the real world. This explains two phenomena: the lack of concern for consequences, and the lack of understanding of our complex world. They just don’t (and won’t) see reality because they aren’t invested in it. Indeed, they oftentimes don’t even believe in it.

Our nation needs people who can and do think long-term, with a strategic mindset. Our leaders must not flinch from the complicated and difficult challenges we face.

As long as the Right insists on not thinking past the next profit statement or prayer meeting, they cannot be trusted to run things.

Mr. B & C

A two-post day in honor of tomorrow’s election: this post about Romney, the other about the President.  Each man has said some bull*** of his own, of course. Today, we shall talk about the stuff that others say about them.  So grab your nose as we dive straight into the manure pile that is political “discourse” in these degenerate times:

“Romney is better for business”: no matter who is Prexy, the markets will respond to market conditions.  Party makes no difference whatsoever, it’s all about the bottom line. Since the markets have been soaring under Obama, there is no evidence that Romney would make them soar any higher.

“Romney has a plan for (fill in the blank)”: not only has he not shared his plans, he has admitted that he will not do so until after the election. He doesn’t want you to know the details, because he’s afraid the plans would make people not want to vote for him.  Those must be some pretty nasty plans, one would agree.

“Romney knows how to create jobs”: he has never provided a solid jobs-created number that stood up to scrutiny.  He has conned a lot of people into believing that making money is synonymous with creating jobs, but in reality there is no such direct relationship.

“Romney will fix the immigration problem”: his family emigrated here from Mexico.  Legal immigrants to be sure, but remember WHY they went to Mexico in the first place: because they wanted to be polygamous.  They came back here only when they were afraid they’d get their asses shot off.

“Romney will protect our religious freedoms”: he will do quite the opposite. He is going to push the narrow, hate-based fundagelical radical tea-party agenda, which would make anyone other than right-wing dominionist sects into second-class citizens. Catholics, Jews, Moslems, Mainline Prods, all will be kicked to the back of the bus.

“Romney will get Big Government off our backs”: depends on who you are, and your net worth. Millionaires and billionaires will get more slack cut for them…but the average schmuck  will pay the bill for government (big or otherwise), be subject to more intrusive surveillance, eroded personal rights, and our wives & daughters will have a government overseer in their gynecologist’s offices.

You wanna vote for this guy? You deserve whatever happens to you.

Mr. B & C

This picture taken at the Marengo Christian Church in North Wherethehell, Ohio:


This church has a shooting range out back, which is crazy enough right there: also, it freaks out the neighbors and has raised their homeowner’s insurance premiums (and lowered their property values into the bargain). But that’s all OK by the Marengo Churchies, because evidently Jesus wants us all to pack hidden heat so as to blow each other away. Mr. Blunt and Cranky has read a good deal of Bible, and cannot find any verse in which He said that.

Do you really want to have a government run by a load of homicidal, fundagelical loons?  Because this Christian Patriot Militia would dearly love to run your life. If that doesn’t scare you, you’re pretty much in a coma.

This picture taken at the Bible Baptist Church in West Wherethehell, Ohio:


Evidently, they don’t read enough of the Bible they named their church after: anyone who has knows that God has not governed in person since Adam and Eve got evicted from Eden. Every ruler since who claims to be ruling according to God’s will (like Jim Jones, Pope Innocent III, Khomeini and so on) is just another schmuck like the rest of us. So there really isn’t any way to have God rule us here on earth (which, by the way, Jesus Himself said).

These people really need to have their legal wings clipped, and kept from imposing their Sharia-On-Steroids laws on the rest of us.

Mr. B & C

In 2002, Elizabeth Smart was abducted and abused by a perverted, nasty, demented, sicko mother****er who claimed to be following the Bible.  Authorities, citizens and media figures of all sorts busted their asses to rescue the child and lock the rat-bastard scumbucket pedophile perpetrator up, as well they should have.

These days, the American Family Association’s Bryan Fischer has issued a fatwa call to do the pretty much the same thing: kidnap children from their parents, because the Bible told him to tell you to do so.  But Americans are pretty much ignoring this incitement (although the cops might do a few things here and there when people actually heed the AFA’s calls to commit heinous crimes).

Q: Why are they so blasé about potential victims of kidnappings by these faux-Christian zealot scumbuckets? A: The Fischer King wants us all to kidnap kids from same-sex couples. The link below describes the sort of criminal activity that the AFA is inciting: a woman who betrayed her vows, violated court orders, traumatized her own child, broke many laws, and is now an international fugitive. She was aided and abetted in these apparently-ever-so-Christ-like crimes by a group of allegedly “religious” criminals:,0,5193449.story

Now we see two recent tweets that condone kidnapping, and incite people to commit such illegal acts:





Stealing children is so despicable, it is hard to imagine anyone supporting it. Oh, that’s right, the AFA demonizes gays, so it’s all good. Right. Uh-huh.

Hey, if this Fischer dirtbag happened to be a Moslem instead of a “Christian”, the FBI would already be waterboarding his ass. But since he’s a white “Christian” American male advocating the committing of crimes against gay folk, it’s apparently no big deal.

It’s just damned lucky for Elizabeth Smart that her parents were straight. If she had come from a same-sex family, she might still be suffering abuse, rape, and torture to this very day, because of the antediluvian attitudes of so many Americans.  It is also safe to say that Bryan Fischer would be defending the scumbucket child rapist who said he was following the Bible, tweeting on his behalf and so on.

People, listen up: children are wonderful, precious gifts to our world. No matter what you may think of their parents, kidnapping is a vile, horrific crime that traumatizes these innocent kids in ways we can hardly fathom. And anyone who advocates such a crime…well, let’s hope that Hell is even worse than we think, because anything less would not be punishment enough for Bryan Fischer, Brian Mitchell, Kenneth Miller, Lisa Miller, and anyone else who would rip a family asunder, scar an innocent child for life, and then claim that Jesus wanted them to do it.

Mr. B & C