Some “Republicans” are all three at once. Not sure how that’s even possible, but Repubes are a load of walking contradictions anyway, so what’s another slab of cognitive dissonance on top of the mountain of political illogic upon which the GOP is already perched? The Predatory Pervy Puritan ‘Pubs they are, then.

Clan Duggar certainly qualify for all those P’s, obviously, plus another for “Pedophiliac”. As does their cop friend, Jim Hutchens, doing time for various baby-abusing-type crimes. As do other Teavangelicals, too many to name here.

Then there’s the Pervert ‘Pub Platoon, exemplified by Pampers-f***er and Prostitute Purchaser “Baby Davy” Vitter. Even though he has no grounds to criticize others for their sexual preferences, he does in fact point his fingers at others for not being normal. As if having sex while wearing a diaper full of one’s own s*** makes one “normal”.

And then there are those like Mike FHuckabee and those of his ilk, who are Puritan ‘Pubs that love Pedophiliacs and Perverts. Be they Duggars or others, Mikey and Co. just LOVES them some child abusers and baby-rapers.

And then there are the Perverted Puritan Pubbies, like Marco Rubio and Jeb Ph***ing Bush, who forced women to post their sex lives online.

These sick motherf***ers must have teenie weenies, to have all these bizzare sexual hangups. Or maybe their mommas never loved them, or daddies weren’t macho enough. Naaaah, they’re just a bunch of Pencil-P*****ed Pedo Preeves.

Vote for them if you are also a Perverted, Pedophiliac, Predatory, Puritan, Prostitute-Purchasing, Pencil-P****ed ‘Pub. Vote against them if you’re not.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky