Today, my wife was mistaken for a Muslim.

The Blunt and Crankies are on our way home from a vacation with wonderful friends in warm, sunny places. As we stopped for the night in Whereverthehell Kentucky, she wrapped a scarf around her head because, well, it’s f***ing cold outside. Looked a bit like a hijab, but who cares when you’ve come from the Florida coast to Freezerville in 36 hours, right?

Wrong. The woman who was misguided enough to marry your humble correspondent is of Irish/Shawnee/Syrian descent, and is frequently taken as a local in whatever country or region in which we are at a given moment. Be it in Central America, Scotland, on a Reservation or so on, people associate her with their ethnic preconceptions. So, when the locals saw her with the scarf wrapped tightly around her head, they projected their image of a Middle Eastern woman upon her. Disturbingly.

Women looked at her with a condescending mixture of pity and disdain. They looked at me as if I were a wife-abusing terrorist. Men looked at us like we were both worthy of being shot by Chris f***ing Kyle.

All because a white woman was chilly and covered her head.

America, you are SO f***ing f***ed. Surprised nobody shot us based on their idiotic, bigoted, stupid-assed ideas.

Je suis Chapel Hill.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky

Who Cares who Alison Lundergan Grimes Voted For?

Bitchy Mitchy McConnell tells a lot of lies. A LOT of lies. But a very subtle and sneaky one jumped out at this humble blogger during the lone debate with his Democratic challenger: he said Americans have no right to a secret ballot:

Grimes stuck to her days-long refusal to say if she voted for Obama in 2008 and 2012. She insisted that if she answered the question, it would “compromise a constitutional right” to cast a secret ballot.

McConnell quickly scoffed at that. “There’s no sacred right to not announce how you voted,” he said, seated next to Grimes for an hour-long debate hosted by KET, the state’s public television station.

There is indeed no explicit Constitutional right to a secret ballot: because Boards of Election need to track voters and ballots to prevent fraud. But that’s the only place where your right to voting privacy is limited.

But old Jerkle the Turtle goes a step further: not only does he not think you have a right to privacy in the voting booth, he thinks you can be forced to reveal your votes if any old yahoo asks you. This is some truly, scarily insidious, authoritarian, big-government s*** here, folks: “Republicans” think they can force you to tell them how you voted, and that you have no right to privacy.

It’s of a piece with GOP philosophy: they hates them some Fourth Amendment. Repubs think the government should be able to wiretap you, arrest you, torture you, dictate your medical care, and monitor your sex life. So voting rights are likewise non-starters for Big Brother Motherf***ers like McConnell and the rest of his party. Once again, Gentle Reader: Repubs think you have no right to privacy.

We should all of us applaud Ms. Grimes’ strong stand on privacy, and support her right to not say for whom she voted. This seems obvious, but even some Democrats are saying she should tell us all how she voted. Poppy-f***ing-cock. She has the same privacy rights as the rest of us, and we should all have her back on this issue – because we all are in the same boat. Want to be forced to tell your boss how you voted, or your parents, or a “news” organization? This writer does not, and you shouldn’t have to, either.

This election isn’t just about candidates, folks: it’s about our freedom from Big Government Repubs and their NSA-Patriot Act-Morals Police-Brute Squad vision of America. We all need to vote against any candidate who would take away our rights, and support any candidate who supports our rights.

Your humble correspondent doesn’t give a single turd from a tufted titmouse’s ass how Ms. Grimes voted. It’s her right to keep it private, and good on her for asserting that right.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky