The Only People Dumber than Congress

Mr. Blunt and Cranky, while strolling along the Internets recently, discovered this: Pretty much everybody hates Congress

In it you will find that Congress is ranked lower than cockroaches and other unpopular groups. Much is being made of how stupid they must be on the Hill, to keep doing things that make them unpopular even when poll after poll tells them that Americans view them as being only slightly better than Ebola.

“Haw haw haw,” we laugh, mocking those idiots in Dizzy City. “What fools they are to alienate the very people who must elect them some day”, we say. And make no mistake, our “representatives” do deserve all of the mud, dung, and brickbats that are sling at them.

So why, if they suck so badly, if they are so useless, if they are that stupid; why, then, were 91-f***ing percent of them re-elected this year?

Answer:the voters of their districts are the real idiots. Yes, gerrymandering; yes, vote rigging; yes, voter suppression; but at the end of the day, the voters need to boot the bums out.

Far too many American voters are unwilling or unable to make intelligent, thoughtful, rational decisions in the voting booth. So when you want to mock the stupid f***s responsible for the clown show on Capital Hill, most of us need look no further than the nearest mirror.

Because if so many people didn’t make such stupid choices when they vote,we wouldn’t have such a stupid Congress.

Mr. B & C

Lying Sack of S*** of The Week: Bitchy Mitchy McConnell

Or maybe he’s just plain crazy. Assuming he’s not, Mr. Blunt and Cranky hereby bestows this week’s Crown O’ Polished Turds upon the misshapen dome of the current Senate Minority Leader, the whiny-arsed bitch that is McConnell.

And how did he rise to the top of the heap in a week that had some truly epic lies told? The “distinguished gentleman” accused a polling firm (and perhaps the Prexy, too, by proxy) of making up poor approval ratings to hurt his future re-election chances.  Really. Not kidding. Use the Googlicious thingie to see for yourself.

Getting bad poll numbers could, indeed, indicate that one’s chances of being re-elected are not as good as one might hope. But instead of paying attention to data and seeing what he could do to improve his rating, this man chose to create a bizzarro conspiracy theory so as to distract from the facts. He should remember that even The Great and Powerful Oz couldn’t make the old “distraction trick” work.

Yo, Mitch the Bitch, we can see through your curtain of lies. Wear your COPT behind it, why don’tcha?

Mr. B & C